The No. 1 element leading to happy relationships is friendship — and friendship is built on conversation.
Every agreement in this book eventually comes back to that. You can have all the right intentions and still drift — from your spouse, from your kids — simply because nobody's actually talking. Not gripe-talking. Not logistics-talking. The kind that makes you feel known. That's what this next section is for.
The idea of guided conversations isn't new — it goes back to "Marriage Encounter" in the Catholic Church, and more recently to Dr. Victor Cline's work on Marriage Enrichment. The questions and formats in "Getting to Know You" build on that same idea: give people a little structure, and they'll open up more than they would on their own.
If you want more, Sue Johnson's Hold Me Tight is great material for the "Write & Share" format below — borrow a few of her questions and make them your own.
And this isn't just for couples. It works for the whole family — car rides, walks, the dinner table, wherever there's a lull. Use it on a private getaway with your spouse, or on a random Tuesday with your kids. Same principle either way: friendship first. Everything else gets easier after that.