A stash of good questions and a few ways to ask them.

⬇️ Table of Contents

👉 How This Works

This page is basically a big bank of conversation starters, plus a few different ways to use them — for car rides, dinner, walks, or whenever there's a lull and nobody knows what to say next. Pick whatever sounds good and go.

👉 Four Ways to Talk

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Walk & Talk

Go for a walk, a drive, or knock out a chore side by side. One person picks and directs a question to a family member or spouse. After the answer is given, the other person can mirror the answer and ask for clarification, which sounds like this: "So what I hear you saying is . Could you tell me more about when you said___?" After a little clarification, switch and start again. Note: This can also be used while listening to an uplifting podcast or audiobook together. Pause the recording when something sparks a thought or question. Share/Ask for clarification, back and forth, as inspired.

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Write & Share

Grab notebooks (or note apps). Everyone writes on the same question for a few minutes, then trades notes with each other and reads — or just reads their own notes out loud. The key here is that everyone is encouraged to get more information i.e. “Tell me more about what you meant when you wrote (or said) ___?” etc.

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Face to Face

The quick version — at the table, in the car, before bed. Pick one question. Then either a) Gently Ask your spouse or family member the same question 3+ times, or as many times as you like, or b) take turns asking the same question back and forth as many times as you’d like, giving a different answer each time. Take as much or little time as you’d like, as inspired, using just one subject line (question) or several.

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Family Chats (Ideally, sitting around a table)

Sit in any order. That's the order you'll go in. Whoever's turn it is:

  1. Pick a category (i.e., “Everyday Life”, “A Little Deeper,” etc.)
  2. Pick a question from that category — or asks Siri/Google, "Pick a number between 1 and ___" (however many questions are in that category).
  3. Ask that question to the person sitting next to you (clockwise).

That person answers. Then it's their turn — they pick a category, pick a question, and ask the person next to them. Keep going around the table like that. Anyone can pass on a question, or say, "Can I get an easier one? or one in a different category?" — no explanation needed. Note: Feel free to respond to someone’s answer e.g. “Tell us more about when you said ___” or “Wow, that’s interesting” or whatever you’d like.

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👉 Guidelines & Suggestions

  1. ⏳ Best to keep these chats shorter- 10 to 20 minutes (depending on ages). This keeps it fun instead of turning it into a chore. But if you’re on a roll, just try to end before the sun rises.
  2. 🪂 Anyone can pass on a question or ask for a different one — no explanation required.